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Sanity… it’s definitely overrated

smile5My intentions for my first bloggity blog were to write about  Budgeting for Single Parents. Well, seeing that my bank just called and said i was “x” amount of dollars overdrawn, I think we’ll work on that another day.  Hey, it happens, and YES I am frustrated.  Here is the thing though, after 3+ years, I am FINALLY off assistance.

Needless to say things are tight, hectic and I mess up here and there. I’ve learned to give myself some slack.   But, overall, I’m doing it…we’re doing it.  The real kicker is that I’m happier, calmer and broker (more broke) than I have been for ages.  Sane?  Now that is another story.  Basically I feel it’s overrated.  I will, however, lend to you some advice on keeping a quasi-sane life.

Tips on Staying Sane:

  • Bedtime, EARLY, kids not you…it took me about a week of sleepless nights to get my kids to realize I meant business…but I stuck to my guns and don’t regret it at all!!! Now I rarely, if at all, get any arguments when I say bedtime.  (Keep in mind, this usually means getting up early in the morning, but it is completely worth it!)
  • Establish a Routine – This sometimes is not an easy task, especially if your schedule is as hectic as mine.   BUT, bedtime means we have the same routine everynight, brush teeth, each one of my two sons picks a book that I read to them, they each tell me about their day, tucked in, kisses, prayer and gooooodnight.  I rarely, if ever, stray from that ROUTINE.
  • Network with other single moms -  These ladies get it. They know what you are going through.  This has been very valuable to me for a number of reasons, and not just because you just gained a free babysitter…(of course you reciprocate the gesture)
  • Accept Help - Never be too proud to accept help if you need it.  In the end you will be better fit (mentally, physically AND emotionally) to care for your children.  If you need assistance, get it, that is why it’s there.  Yes, I’m talking welfare.  You wont be on it for ever. Think about the writer for Harry Potter, yep, she was on welfare.
  • Separate Need from Want - Be a good example to your children.  De-value material possessions.  Start this early.  It may be rare, but if you ever have “extra” money…spend it on “adventures” not “things”…the kids really will be much happier, take my word for it!
  • DONT GET CABLE. – I’m telling you DON’T do it.  Turn the TV off.  Put that money aside for something else.  My kids will rarely see me watching tv. I either have a book in my hand or I’m writing.  Teach the kids to play.  Nix the word “bored” outta their vocabulary.  It does not exist.
  • Find a good church.  And go. – I never considered myself a religious person..nope NEVER.  But this has been such a saving grace.  I actually love going to church.  It is an amazing support system, and and unbelievable comfort.  Spirituality is so important to me AND my kids.  When you think you have no one…you have God.  That’s all I’m going to say about that… done.

Well, as an introduction blog, I think that should do it.  I wouldn’t want to overwhelm you or myself.

Remember, Sanity…IS overrated.

This post was written by:

twinmother05 - who has written 21 posts on Single Moms Indiana.

I am a single mother of twin boys born in the fall of 05. I have sole custody of my children. One of my children is special needs and has an unknown disease. "it takes a village to raise a child" African Proverb

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2 Responses to “Sanity… it’s definitely overrated”

  1. Rachel C says:

    Congrats!!! Your ideas sound spot on!Look how far you have come. Your little ones are so lucky to have such a great mom.

  2. Tracey says:

    All very good points. Finally someone else that has a set routine for bedtime. A lot of people I know just put their kids to bed whenever and let them stay up late so that they can sleep in in the morning. Our kids are in bed at 8:00 every night unless there is a special occasion/holiday. When we get away from routine they act up the next night and don’t sleep as well. Yes I have to get up early since they go to bed early but that is fine with me. Of course everyone does what works for them but we have found that we get more alone time when the kids go to bed early…time for us to relax before going to bed ourselves.
    I look forward to more of your blogs. You did a great job!

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