Four years ago when my children were just fetuses in my belly, I witnessed every temper tantrum thrown by toddlers.  They usually occurred right in the middle of stores, kids on the ground stomping their feet, screaming like wild banshies.  The mothers were usually helpless and gave into these wild children.  I bet you at one point thought or said these words “My child will NEVER be like that.” or “I would NEVER give into that.”

Fast forward three years, I am in a store and I witness a child meltdown.  Only this time, I don’t roll my eyes or say that “my children would NEVER do that.”  I actually have sympathy for this mother.  Why, you ask? Well, because I AM THE MOTHER.  Yep, it happened.  The very idea of handing my out of control child WHATEVER he wanted didn’t seem all that wrong, if only to make it all go away.

Rewarding my childs temper tantrum didn’t seem so bad after all.  The very thing that had us shocked and appalled not so long ago now makes perfect sense.  Alright, alright, we know that realistically this is NOT the best way to handle the situation.  I’ve done it, yep.  Bought them both a DVD  just to make it ALL go away…um, does it matter that I ended up taking them back?  NOPE, not to the kids…I only taught them that throwing a temper tantrum means a reward.

Just so you know, i no longer do this.  NO, i dont keep them locked in the basement away from the public eye.  NO, they didnt completely quit throwing fits.  It is something that just happens, and usually it’s just bad timing on my part.  To help, I watched a lot of Nanny 911 and read a lot of blogs from other mothers and found what works for me and my kiddos.  Remember, this is just what works for ME.

• PREVENTION - Make sure your child is not tired or hungry when doing an errand.  Even I’ve probably been known to throw a tantrum or two when I’m tired and hungry.  I understand that sometimes this isn’t possible, just be prepared for a meltdown
• DONT LOSE COOL remain calm.  Try to NOT focus on the people around you and their response.  Stay in control.  If YOU, the adult, the parent, loses their cool…the situation is in deep trouble.
• QUICK DISTRACTION if possible. Try and distract them when you can feel it coming…WOW, DID YOU SEE THAT?!
• REMOVE CHILD from public eye.  Take the child outside on a bench or better yet to the car, buckle them in and let them calm down.  I understand that if you are in the middle of checking out with a cart load of groceries, maybe this is not possible.  Most likely the cashier will be moving a little quicker for you.
• DO NOT GIVE IN Never, never give in, because the child will think that his behavior warrants a reward…IT DOESN’T
• TALK once your child calms down. Let them know the behavior was not appropriate…have a real talk with them.

These are just a few things I’ve picked up from other parents, talk show hosts and tv shows.  This may not work for you.  All situations are different and require a much analyzed approach.  I wish you luck in your next child tantrum experience.